We had a nice lesson today in how to deal with disappointments. Nice might not be the right word, but a lesson nonetheless.
Terrific T has wanted a pig for over a year. His last obsessions didn't last this long, so we told him last fall that if he saved enough money, he could get one. We figured we were pretty safe since money burns a hole right through his pocket at the first Lego or Webkinz he passes. But....we didn't count on Christmas money. Darn.
So, he now has enough dough in the bank (yep, we finally opened bank accounts for them this week - big day) and we started looking for the perfect pig. He has been researching them for ages and read all the books from the library on how to care for them. We found a cutie (well, it IS a pig so I use that term loosely) and started emailing the owner. She was super sweet, keeping it for her grandkids and he needs more attention but is a good piggie. Talked back and forth all day and Big Daddy and I decided this was the one.
It crossed my mind that the city might not be as excited about us having a pig as we were so I called to check. I really thought they would say it was ok honestly, but since DHS will be here this week for our homestudy, I didn't want to have anything "illegal" in the house.
They said no.
No pigs in city limits.
Not even cute little miniature pot bellied pigs, who are way smarter than dogs (sorry, Wondermutt) and totally house pets?
There were tears. Lots and lots of tears. T was crying. A lot. I was crying, because my baby was clinging to me crying and asking, "WHY?!?!" P was crying, though I'm not totally sure why honestly. I think it had something to do with her wanting a bunny and she thinks she can't now since they said no. I'm not correcting her on that one just yet. ;)
There was praying. Me praying over T for comfort in his time of sadness.T praying for them to make just one exception to the rule. At one point P came downstairs and said accusingly, "I am praying about it. Are you???" to me.
I sent him to shower and we listened to him cry in there. Then he spent some time swinging...with his stuffed pig, Bacon. P said she has never seen him this sad, and it's true. I can't think of a time really, when he has just been....sad.
And then he was ready to talk. We talked about how it totally stinks, but God has a plan and it will be ok. There is a reason for everything and His ways are better than our ways. We talked about that even though we don't agree with the rule, we have to follow it (unless we can find a loophole).
Then he called his cousin and "she was so sweet. She didn't even mention the pig." She made it better. They face-timed and their Webkinz talked to each other and they laughed and it was good.
I took him to play practice after that and we got to talk some more on the way. He is still holding out hope that they will change the rule, but what surprised me was when he said, "it will be sad when our foster kids go back to their families." We talked a LOT about that as we drove and how God will comfort us through that too.
A surprising turn in conversation but a good one. The grieving process is going to be much the same and we talked about how it is ok to cry and hold each other. Pray. Be sad. Then pick ourselves up and keep on swimming. He needed to talk that through and I asked him if he still wants to have foster kids, even though there will be some very sad times when they leave and he didn't hesitate. YES! and he hopes we get them soon.
Me too, honey.